Sitting In My Booth: One Husky Man Selling His Art

An artist, selling his ceramic sculptures at art festivals, passes the time in his booth by writing pithy observations about neck tattoos, beards, corgis, phone holsters, dairy products, t shirts that feature sassy wordplay, man buns, capri pants, and oh my gosh is there anything that doesn't rankle this guy?

Publisher Marketing: Sitting in my booth (Boise edition). Minority Report: eight confirmed sightings. Older gentleman stopped in front of my booth, opened up his cargo pocket, pulled out a comb, combed his hair, slid that bad boy back into his cargo pocket, then proceeded with the rest of his life. Ordinary Guy asked me, "So what is this, like a steampunk/day of the dead thing?" I replied, "No. Well maybe, I don't know really. What are those shorts, like a divorced dad/youth football coach thing?" Happy to report that phone holsters are still trending among white men north of fifty. Dude wearing a shirt that says Tom Petty Is My Spirit Animal. I believe the phone holster crowd's shirt would say Kevin Costner Is My Spirit Animal. Man wearing a shirt with an image of an eagle transposed over the American flag. Underneath the image it says Love It Or Leave It. It should just say Sad! Couple came in and said, "We bought one of these a few years ago from you. We have it hanging above our bed." I said, "Oh neat! It's like I'm right there with you two, keeping tabs on your love making and making sure things don't get out of hand. Omg, you guys have the most random safe word!" Little girl announced to her mom, "Can we go to the next booth before I get so creeped out that I throw up?" Wholesome Man exclaimed enthusiastically, "These are freaking awesome!" I told him, "It's cool, you can curse in here. This is a fucking Mayberry-Free zone, bro." It looks like faux state pride shows no sign of slowing down amongst the creatively bankrupt Pinterest inspired craft makers out there. The geographic shape of Idaho on reclaimed farm wood, t shirts, hats, totes, pillows, and kitchen towels can be used in dozens of creative and fun ways. And don't forget to put a random succulent plant in your booth! Teenage girls in 2018: ripped jeans, Spicoli Vans skateboarding shoes, and timeless angst. Gal wearing a shirt that says You Had Me At Pumpkin Spice. If I were to wear a random word shirt that paraphrases a Jerry Maguire quote it would probably (prolly) be You Had Me At Franz Oat Nut Bread With Jif Creamy Peanut Butter And Smuckers No Sugar Added Seedless Raspberry Jam With Any Brand Cheesy Poofs Sandwiched In Between Paired With A Big Ass Glass Of Homogenized Alpenrose Milk. Distinguished looking lady enters my booth and quietly says, "This looks like the cantina scene in Star Wars." I responded, "You look like every Meryl Streep scene in Devil Wears Prada!" Big thanks to the fine folks of Boise for another successful year of letting me infiltrate your scene!! See you next year Eye D Hoe!!! Someone should put that on a piece of reclaimed wood in the shape of Idaho, except swap out the Eye with an image of an eye!!!! And swap out the Hoe with an image of a hoe!!!!! A GARDENING hoe, you sickos!!!!!! Like the ones that unearth potatoes!!!!!!! Review Quotes : This is a great book to have around the house. Short, funny, and insightful passages about the world around us. Got five minutes to kill before going to work? Read one "post" and you're guaranteed to have a laugh before heading off. - Jeffrey Parker Anytime an artist gives you a peek into their world you should take the peek. Rather fascinating existence. Wonderful perspective. Also books are cool. - Lily Lyons An overdue look into selling art out of a tent and the reality of the general public (Gen Pop). - Woodworker Jeff This book is hysterical! Witty and easy to read. Great perspective from an artist who puts himself out there for the world to judge. - Jen P Cynical Genious! So funny, I almost peed. - Anne Publisher Marketing : An artist, selling his ceramic sculptures at art festivals, passes the time in his booth by writing pithy observations about neck tattoos, beards, corgis, phone holsters, dairy products, t shirts that feature sassy wordplay, man buns, capri pants, and oh my gosh is there anything that doesn't rankle this guy?

Format: Paperback | Pages: 270 | Publication Date: 2019-09-24